|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
If I'd started writing this page a few years ago it would have been really easy
cause I had it all planned out. These days I still aspire to achieve many of
the same things, but as time has passed I've become less obsessed with fictious
goals which will cause me to be happy when i reach them and more interested in
achieving happiness right now.
On the whole subject of time, I fully subscribe to the Buddhist view that the past
has already happened, the future is imaginary and only the present moment exists.
Our present state, both physically and
mentally is dependent upon our pasts. Every moment of our pasts were at one time
the present. Therefore futile wishes to change our lives, to start living them as we want
x amount of days, years, months etc in the future have no positive effect to the
present happiness. As we get older our past gets compacted into
smaller and smaller memories, if we are unhappy with our current past the only way
to rectify the situation without a radical new way of looking at it is by doing
the things and acting now how we want to look back on. That way our experience of
the present in the future, which is dependant on the past will be a better
experience. Got it?
The future has always been important to me, I think its important to have goals.
However I have become fixated on an obituary time in my future when I will be
perfectly happy and in the meantime, whilst I am enjoying myself and life, I have
yet to hit this state. Being in such a state for me is dependant on certain criteria
being met first, such as physical location, the right job, the right accommodation
etc. I realise that this shouldn't be the case, that the only thing that exists is
the present, but it isn't something that I have gotten my head around totally yet.
On a day to day basis it just all still seems bit too much like random hippy mumbo
jumbo bollocks.
When I first started designing this site I intended to write a few paragraphs about
where I'd like to be in the future, but even now, a year or so later I'm not sure how
relevant it is anymore. Perhaps it's simply a case of as I get older I am becoming more
hardened and less ambitious, but at the same rate of this happening I seem to be
becoming more content without looking so far forward and instead enjoying life right
now. After all, by my own reasoning, it's all that exists.
Anyway, if one thing can be concluded from this it's that I wish that I had kept
pretentiouswank as the domain name for this site :-)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
